Art School
2002-11-28 || 5:29 p.m.

Things are coming along nicely. The house is tidied and there is sort of space. The plan is that, by tomorrow, the clothes on the two airers (which take up most of my living room space) will be dry and be able to go somewhere else. That's the plan. The trouble is damp houses don't help plans like that. I've got the sofa covers drying on the radiators but the rugs are still wet at the moment. At this time I really do wish I could tie a knot in the dog's penis.

I don't know what we are going to do about music. I think Rebecca's 'boyfriends' will probably take control of it; so that will be Korn and Cradle of Filth all round then.

I have a terrible headache. Its partly the stress of socialising. I like my friends, I really do but I always think they don't like me, which is actually awfully insulting (to them that is). I am a bitch. I also did art all day long at school in a vain attempt to get some stuff together for my Christmas board which has to go up by Monday. Can you imagine? 31 children getting covered in paint and glue and not listening? I drew these candy sticks and balls with stripes. All they had to do was to paint them in brightly coloured stripes.

What did I get?

Fucking camouflage toys. Any army would have been proud of them.

I had to stop them and show them how to put the paintbrush in water and not mix all the colours together. But they just get into a frenzy the minute they see the art shirts appearing and paint being squeezed onto saucers. It sends them off onto one.

They made some lovely hearts though. We made hearts which are supposed to represent heart-shaped biscuits which (allegedly) are eaten in some parts of Europe. I got them to do a pastel wash across the heart, stick cotton wool around the edge and sprinkle glitter across the middle. I told them they were biscuits to go around the border of our board.

One child asked me if we could eat them when they come down.

The trouble was, I really think they were serious!