The Journey - Part XII
2002-11-24 || 1:47 p.m.

The hemlock from the last entry was making me drowsy. I need to write to stay awake and continue the journey.

I hate platitudes. I hate being stopped from doing what I want to do.

I hate this living in my head stuff but I cannot escape. There is no real world to escape to.

The real world is flat and has nothing in it. I don't know how people stand it. I can't join you there because I just don't know how to get in. I'm never satisfied, not with anything. Everything about me is a sham.

I'm finally beginning to realise something though and that is that it really doesn't matter what I write or what I think. Ultimately it all vanishes into nothingness. Just like me. I am a metaphor for thought. Haha.

I can't make sense of the solid, where does it come from?

I get the problem. Physically I'm in the solid but mentally I'm somewhere else. Fuckers.

The landscape is definitely changing now.

'Definitely' - a word that has more meaning for me than you would know. A word that binds together.

I hate writing cryptically.

My mind feels like someone let all the air out.