Domesticity
2002-04-11 || 6:57 p.m.

Well, I've just got back from walking the dog. I took him all the way down to the river so it was a long one. I hoped it would get rid of my headache but it didn't. He's exhausted now. Me, I've got to get used to exercise because I'm going to have a fitness regime for the summer. This time last year I was swimming three times a week, now - nothing. So I have decided to walk to work and back. No more getting two buses for me. I already walk the dog twice a day and I'm going to go back to swimming although I would imagine it will only be twice a week.

So what sort of a day did I have? Ok. I found my missing geography booklet. I input some decision trees onto my computer for ICT in the next few weeks. I did all my ICT planning for the rest of this school year and photocopied it for Kylie. She loved me. Apparently everyone else was in a bad mood and taking it out on her. Well, I don't do that anyway. Not that I don't get in bad moods but I only ever turn them inwards and take it out on myself. I think the others at work think I am emotionless. I was thinking about this the other day. Well on Saturday really because I went to Helen's on Saturday evening and Cathy was there and Ann and they are all really nice but I just cannot speak to them. I mean at all. If people ever describe me they say I am quiet but I'm not really. However, I just don't have anything in common with them and so I cannot speak. Weird. In all my other jobs I've had this sort of slot as the strange one. Whatever my colleagues have been like I've always got on well with them because they've liked me to have this role and I like it too but here I just don't seem to have a role at all.

Rebecca made me laugh today. I went round to my Dad's to meet her after school and she just looked a right state because of her poor uniform. I did feel a bit sorry for her. She said to me that she needed a new jumper and I said, 'well, you've only got three more years in uniform do you not think it will last?'. She gave me a look and said 'no, its coming undone'. So I said that if she tells me when the next Parents' Old Uniform Sale is I will go and buy her a second hand jumper. Well the look on her face. She glared at me and said, 'but they're for ...' and I said, 'yeah, poor people!'.

She laughed then. But I don't think she thought I meant it. Her school uniform is so expensive. When she started there 18 months ago I spent �500 on it. Can you believe that!

She was rooting through my bag when we got in and I asked her what she was looking for, she replied, 'your mobile.' I said there was no point, there's no credit on it anyway because she spent all of Tuesday texting Uncle David with her 'you've won a new grandmother' routine. She does have a new one now. Its the 'You've won a non-speaking role in Lord of the Rings II'!!

I do think she's funny and I'm rather proud that they had to send a memo round at school asking for the Grandmother prank to stop because so many teachers had won them. I think a few also won life size chocolate replicas of a Mercedes Benz too.

I went out for a drink with Lindsay on Tuesday evening and she was saying that she's completely convinced that Rebecca will be well famous. Maybe she will be able to keep me in a manner to which I've never been accustomed. Mind you, Rebecca is so like me as far as motivation goes. She is totally unmoved by money and material things; her motivation comes from different things. She is incredibly motivated to help her friends. She's a very kind child. Also, just like me she has no way with authority and conformity is, well, just unheard of. She also has a very well developed sense of right and wrong. I've no idea what she'll do when she's older. She wants to go to art college. Her drawing skills are excellent.

Well I'd better stop rambling on about my beautiful daughter. We need to eat soon and I've got to go and put the rabbits away.

And just as a postscript. Aren't my entries boring when I'm not depressed?