On not being cool and talking bollocky bollocks
2002-08-05 || 4:16 p.m.

I went upstairs to get dressed earlier and I found I needed a very big belt to hold my jeans up. Jesus, if this was 1982 I could join Dexys Midnight Runners.

I got to level 22 on Beehive Bedlam.

I wrote loads of stuff down yesterday on bits of paper. They are upstairs on the floor by my bed. I also did lots of cooking yesterday. I made potato salad, green salad, rice salad and pasta salad. I put fresh chillis in the pasta salad.

I want to write something witty and amusing.

You know something? I like being a vegetarian. Surprisingly, considering the crap I write, there are actually things I like about myself. Maybe I should write some of them down sometime.

I worked out a possible solution to my problems earlier. What I need is a man with the words of Morrissey, the insight of Marc Bolan and the looks of Johnny Depp - well possibly the looks thing is erroneous: Looks negotiable, wit and insight compulsory.

Ha! don't want much do I?