Sex
2002-05-06 || 1:33 p.m.

I've just had the funniest five minute conversation about sex.

Rebecca has been having her diary reviewed and she keeps getting really high marks. She's trying to persuade me to have mine reviewed but I don't want to. I warned her that I had a good entry I'd been planning but that she'd better not read it. She said, "why, is it about sex?" I replied "yes, because I thought that it would mean I would come up on people's searches for porn". She said that most activity on the net is probably porn searches. I said "exactly".

Rebecca then went on to advise me that I didn't need to write an entry about sex I could just title it 'XXX wet pussies XXX' !!

Now what did I, as her mother, say to this? Did I say:

1. Wash your mouth out, how dare you speak like that.

2. Go to your room and think about what you have just said.

Or did I say, "would that be an 'ie' or a 'y' spelling?"

This all came about because Rebecca commented that someone on MTV had 'lesbian hair'*. I said that I would like to have 'lesbian hair'. Rebecca said that I do, when I am out with Soo. She said that my long hair and Soo's short hair make us look like the ideal lesbian couple! So I have lesbian hair by association.

Anyway, I woke up this morning and decided I would buy a vibrator. Why do I not own one already you ask. Well, because when I was about 12 I remember reading on a problem page about someone who was addicted to the orgasms that a vibrator give you. I was pretty scared at this, thinking, "oh my God, I'd never be able to have an orgasm with a real live dick". Anyway, this morning, nearly 20 years later it suddenly struck me: I'm never going to have that again anyway! Dumbass.

* I think at this point I should explain that the phrase 'lesbian hair' did not originate from Rebecca. It springs from a comment made on New Year's Eve by someone else about someone else who looks like someone on an MTV video Ok.